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Everything posted by Hawk_Eye

  1. 4 Nation International Rugby

    You cannot believe that there are folk who selected Australia to win against New Zealand - Half time 32 / 3 NZ {{Scientists say the universe is made up of: protons, neutrons and electrons. They forgot to mention morons.}}
  2. These are the invoices that went trough KPMG..Glad they are not my auditors.. Ever wondered how you load a bill to get to R30m? Here are invoices for #GuptaWedding. You tell us what @KPMG_SA missed. Enjoy! #GuptaLeaks
  3. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    Where is our favourite Aussie - @Docker? This is serious.. In the last year, cases of a ghastly but mysterious flesh-eating bacterial infection have more than doubled in Victoria, Australia, raising alarm among health experts. There were 239 cases of the flesh-eating infections in the past 12 months, according to figures (PDF) released this week by health authorities. In 2016, there were only 102 reported cases, while 2015 and 2014 tallied just 58 and 47. And the rate of new infections is currently skyrocketing: in the past few months, case counts hit nine per week, according to Australia’s Nine News. The number of severe cases has also doubled. While the rises alone are enough to worry health experts, the fact that virtually nothing is known about the cause of the infection has some dismayed. “I’m at the forefront as a clinician trying to treat patients and getting more and more overwhelmed but also distressed at the fact that we are doing nothing to try and prevent people getting it in the first place,” Dr. Daniel O’Brien, of Royal Melbourne and Geelong hospitals, told Nine News. Baffling bacteria The infections are caused by Mycobacterium ulcerans, a slow-growing bacterium that causes gaping, palm-sized ulcers. Sometimes called Buruli ulcers, the lesions seem to dissolve skin and gnaw away at tissue. The bacteria are known to lurk around Victoria, but experts don’t know where it lives or how it spreads. More at the link..
  4. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    You guys only know the cyber persona. He is in fact a very competent CA with his own business. He left the varsity where he worked and was well loved by his peers to start a new venture. Stop being jealous and pay the man some respect.
  5. 2018 Super Rugby Draw

    Thanks - But is this competition really still relevant?
  6. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    Nope - not made that way..they are mostly clock watchers..
  7. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    There is no need. Our system (SAM4Windows) does not have a month end or day end. You set the calendar at the beginning of the financial year. You select your debtor dates and the system does all the rest. All debtors are automated and sent via pdf. All month-end reports are automatically spooled - all can be directly ported to Excel (because some folk still like to look busy). We do not print anything - we try to save paper because many a report is printed and never used. Users can flag their reports which will then be mailed to them via internal mail in pdf format. No need for anyone to babysit the system for a month end. A similar procedure - but more intricate - happens at year end when a 14th month is created for bean counters. We also allow auditors to log into the system remotely - they have access to only a query database which is replenished daily - this way they cannot screwup the live system etc.

    A joke is a joke, but you do not leave an albino in the sun, you do not put sand in a moffie (queer)'s Vaseline, you do not buy a radio for a deaf person, you do not organise an parent's evening at the orphanage, you never stick an "arrive alive" sticker to a hearse....and you never let a Springbok team play against the All Blacks
  9. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    Very true...again the difference between knowledge and experience. When you take that "knowledge" you acquired and you put it in practice over and over then you gain experience and only then do you start adding value. Basics is what is wrong with modern rugby too...
  10. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    That must've been a big bag of "beans" to count.. LOL See. us IT guys made everyone's life so much easier.
  11. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    Very seldom does theory and real life gel completely. Theoretically you can turn a tennis ball inside out without puncturing it.. LOL
  12. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    Many of these kids know how to play games on a computer. However when it comes to the actual working of a program and the stored-procedures in the database that does virtually "everything", they know nothing. Our system keeps track of every user and every intervention is time-stamped. At month end if they want to know who did "this" - we can tell them to the second which user from which IP address did it and how long the user spent on that specific transaction. Had a case the other day where the marketing guys tried to blame IT for a certain input which screwed their stats...... we wrote a script and printed it out, LOL the guy complaining and blaming was the one who did it.....marketing guys are good at backpedaling and perfect alibi-management ..
  13. Gupta Wedding - For the beancounters

    True. When we did system audit for BMW - in other words checking the database architecture and ensuring the calc and procedures are correct we were "assisted" by an auditing firm. They sent little nose-pickers who were doing articles. One asked me if the system simply "drops" the difference (rounding) in transactions. I felt like dropping him on his freaking head. Had to explain in detail how the system calculates, rounds and what happens to the difference...written to a GL account called "rounding" and at month-end the "balance" of 11 cent (derived from transactions close to 2 million) or so is either added to profit or added to expenses depending on the amount being positive or negative. So when an "auditor" accepts that money value can simply be discarded I question their varsity lectures / logic. What if it is a big amount? The system has a parameter that flags any amount bigger than X.xx to send a mail to who ever is designated.. Stupid fucks.
  14. Ping Vlag & Supersupporter

    @vlagman & @supersupporter Seems you guys are in for some nasty weather.. http://www.express.co.uk/news/weather/855681/Weather-forecast-2017-UK-Storm-Brian-path-Atlantic-storm-map-track
  15. 4 Nation International Rugby

    Springboks are a joke..

    At least they did not have to resort to fapping like Toetie - because I cannot believe he gets more than that..
  17. 4 Nation International Rugby

    Did he and the Super Bos not have a little dance at one stage when I was too busy to visit - I just saw a glimpse one evening..
  18. 4 Nation International Rugby

    Have you checked this guy when he "stretches" that bottom jaw... Goeie genade... he can fit a MD-burger in there in one hap..
  19. 4 Nation International Rugby

  20. 4 Nation International Rugby

    Mtawarira could qualify..Does he not stay near Escort in KZN..
  21. 4 Nation International Rugby

    There's a helpline for grieving Springbok supporters. 0800 57 0 57 0
  22. 4 Nation International Rugby

    At the start of the pro era there was still a lot of passion and love for the game.. Today I wonder... Also such a comparison shows a valuable coach and selection on merit..
  23. 4 Nation International Rugby

    That'll mean the old buggers will have to play with 13 men.. may just handicap them a bit..